Future?

Been thinking today, like I always do. But today's been a deep kind of thinking all about my future and what it was supposed to be like, and how it's turning out to be completely different.

Have you ever fallen in love, like actual love? I did, once. He was the most amazing person I have ever laid my eyes on, or had the privilege of meeting. My life was more than perfect when he was around, I mean we had our differences and we had arguments/fights like any other couple would have. We both had made mistakes but we were working on them. He was honestly my best friend in the entire universe, I felt so comfortable with him, could talk to him about anything or just act like myself. Never found any man like him before in my life. 

Things obviously went down hill because we're no longer together. But I still love him way more than I should at this moment. And it sucks because we has plans for our future together... we had already been living together, had little babies (which are our reptiles), but we were talking about marriage one day and kids. It was a serious relationship but everything fell apart because of insecurities and lies. 

I miss him more than you could imagine, he's the perfect man in my eyes and I can't stand the fact he isn't mine anymore. My future is so messy ... I don't know what to think anymore, and I don't know what my future holds now. Wish I was still his woman. 

Hope my future turns out being good.