5:45am
I can't sleep. I have tried for many hours now, just laying in my bed with everything off, focusing on sleep. It doesn't work.
Tonight was one of those that started amazing and then at the last minute it just went to shit. It isn't even like the issue at hand was THAT major. Just a friend who's being over reactive about something I said. Not going to get into detail about it, but let's just say doing the right thing isn't actually the 'right thing to do'.
I'm seriously already sick of the new me. You know, the one who tells it how it is and doesn't sugar coat bullshit. The one that makes sure people don't get hurt in the long run even if it means hurting them at the moment. The one who just wants to be single until I get my life on track.
How many times does someone try until they finally get the point? Apparently 10+. Just cannot comprehend how someone can put themselves through so much suffering even though it's been explained many times on multiple levels that it isn't what they think it is. God damn... just can't stand it anymore.
From now on, there's no preventing someone from holding onto something that isn't there. I'm allowing them to fall hard and stay that way with every single imaginable "false hope" they could ever fathom, because regards of what you *think* is the right thing to do, the opposing person is going to *believe* differently.
Tonight was one of those that started amazing and then at the last minute it just went to shit. It isn't even like the issue at hand was THAT major. Just a friend who's being over reactive about something I said. Not going to get into detail about it, but let's just say doing the right thing isn't actually the 'right thing to do'.
I'm seriously already sick of the new me. You know, the one who tells it how it is and doesn't sugar coat bullshit. The one that makes sure people don't get hurt in the long run even if it means hurting them at the moment. The one who just wants to be single until I get my life on track.
How many times does someone try until they finally get the point? Apparently 10+. Just cannot comprehend how someone can put themselves through so much suffering even though it's been explained many times on multiple levels that it isn't what they think it is. God damn... just can't stand it anymore.
From now on, there's no preventing someone from holding onto something that isn't there. I'm allowing them to fall hard and stay that way with every single imaginable "false hope" they could ever fathom, because regards of what you *think* is the right thing to do, the opposing person is going to *believe* differently.
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